Navigating A Bumpy Road: Embracing Tough Times and Celebrating the Good

Hello and yup I'm back. Sorry not been around for a few weeks but I will fill you in. Just got back from a holiday to Florence and, it's true, you need a holiday to get over a holiday, well in my case you do!! 🥴😄

It is a beautiful place, loads of places of interest (and we went to them all) but boy was it tiring, and hot 🥵. We are due to go to Rome in April 2026, probably our last trip abroad 😎.

Just smiling to myself; I do these posts and notice, no-one is reading them or visiting my page, but, hey ho, at least it helps me to put down in words what's happening in my life, good and not so good. If you are reading this, please leave a like or a message so I know there is a world out there 😄.

What did I learn over the past few weeks? Well, quite a lot really. Not ashamed to say that I have not felt my best, emotionally, physically or spiritually, but I am thankful that God in His wisdom opened a door for me totally out of the blue. I am going to share some things that are not easy but if it helps someone/anyone else then it's worth it.

A few years ago I was studying to become a Counsellor, got 2 years into my course and doing okay, but then: BUMP

I was being constantly put down and made fun of with one guy (an ex-met policeman) to the point I was coming home in tears, so I packed it in.

This had been a familiar pattern throughout life, jobs I had, bands I was in, church life and an and on....you get the picture. But my solution was to just smile and walk away but it was me that has always lost out. The worst and most recent was the killer that made me SO ill! a person that constantly criticised me and put me down in front of others; took me 2 years and therapy to finally let go! I didn't know then but things were about to change. I truly believe these things happen for a reason and just at the right time. I never realised that what happens in early life can shape who we become but with God's help and grace, we don't need to stay stuck in the past. Christ said 'He has come to give us life and life in abundance' and also 'who the Son sets free is free indeed' I just didn't know it.

Anyhow! a few weeks ago I spoke to a lovely lady who encouraged me to take up my counselling again, which I did and am thoroughly enjoying it (this is online though as I am still hesitant of being part of a group in case it happens again). I was also given the opportunity to have some personal counselling myself which I was hesitant about but oh my! the things that have come to light that have totally changed the way I think and feel about myself, how God sees me and how I see others. I can truly empathise with anyone struggling with issues that have may been hidden for years that can affect us today. Some if not most people don't know or can't face things and is just easier to just get on with life, but some things are just too difficult to cope with and we need help.

When I looked back at all those events and why I never felt able to face these people and always put a brave face on that it didn't hurt, just walk away, I hate conflict so just let others treat me the way they wanted. I understand more now, what I thought was Grace was in fact fear and low self esteem; keeping quiet, giving up the things I loved was/is NOT the solution, being honest was/is. I see that I have a voice, I matter, my feelings, my thoughts, my opinions matter; that I can be assertive and gracious at the same time; there is no need for confrontation, anger or high emotions which had all been bottled up inside and made me feel physically ill, stressed and anxious, worthless and more besides. Then I felt guilty because of my faith in God; I should believe what He says; what/who I am is the real truth and that people are flawed, imperfect and have their own struggles that at times they may take things out on others. There are mean, cruel people in the world, and always will be; those who dislike you for just who you are, what you have that they haven't, but that doesn't mean they have the right to bully and control or manipulate you out of their own hurt. You can set boundaries, guard yourself, be kind to yourself, say NO and not feel guilty; don't take on others stresses, offences; listen to 2 sides of a story (things aren't always as they seem). I truly believe and see, those who control/manipulate/put others down etc have deep down issues of their own. Another struggle I have/had was trying to 'fix' others who were in trouble; this used to weigh heavy on me to see people in pain; I know now I can't and am not meant to fix anyone, only be there to comfort. Course we can be there for each other, but I no longer absorb their emotions, stress or anxiety. When we are at peace in ourselves, just our presence to others can be a great source of comfort and peace; a hug, a kind word, just listening can be just what they need.

OWN IT!!!!

I also have had to face things I have done and be accountable for my actions, my part in things, own it; forgiving those who have caused me any pain or hurt through this I found that healing of the heart, mind and soul is the result. Really, it is all there in the word of God; 'be angry and sin not' 'be anxious for nothing' 'cast your cares on Him for He cares for you' 'forgive not 7 times but 77' and Philippians 4 v 8-9.

Am I saying I have got it all sewn up? Definitely not! I am on a journey, a bumpy road; what I am not doing is looking back

Past is just that ...... THE PAST

Anyone who may want to talk to me about anything I have said that resonates with them, I am here to listen, to understand and tell you, you are not on your own, things can change; you can't change other people or even situations but you can be made whole and be who you were meant to be. Love and peace.